kidattypewriter

Friday, October 08, 2004

Follicle Politics

The Toupee of Doom
A Moral Allegory,
or,
An Allegorical Moral
(I'm not sure what)


It came from the depths of outer space... from a planet wrenched and wracked by wars, death and destruction. It had evil on its mind, and universal conquest as a plan.

It also had very bad manners.


It was the EVIL TOUPEE OF DOOM!
Pretty soon it found its unknowing victim... a little girl by the name of Margaret Anne who lived in a small town in England...

Dear sweet innocent little thing, totally unaware of what is about to happen to her...


With unerring instinct, the toupee wrapped itself over the little girls head. Follicles quickly pierced the little girls skull and inserted themselves into her brain. Before she knew it, the old little girl had ceased to be. Instead, the toupee-girl had become a new and fearsome entity ... the THATCHEROS!!!!

I am the dreaded Thatcheros! Bow before me, all, or FEEL MY WRATH!!!


"YES!" cried the Toupee. "NOW MY EVIL PLANS FOR WORLD DOMINATION CAN COMMENCE! I WILL BEGIN BY BREAKING THE BACKS OF THE UNIONS! AND ALLYING MYSELF WITH THE MOST CONSERVATIVE AMERICAN PRESIDENT TO HAVE EVER EXISTED! AND BY CONTINUING TO OPPOSE THE SOVIET UNION! AND PRETTY SOON, A NEW ERA OF ECONOMIC PROSPERITY WILL DAWN - AND ALL SHALL BE MY SLAVES! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!"

So the toupee set about putting its plans into action.

Boo hoo hoo.


"Boo hoo hoo" cried little Margaret Anne. "Let me go, please let me go."
But the toupee had other plans, and using Margaret Anne's body as a vessel, had soon spawned other toupees, who found themselves around the world...

Sweet little Bronwyn Bishop of Australia...


And innocent little Madeleine Albright of America...


"EXCELLENT", smirked the Thatcheros. "IT'S ALL FALLING INTO PLACE..."

Excellent...


The End

1 comment:

kathrynoh said...

i'm laughing so much i ache.

Email: timhtrain - at - yahoo.com.au

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