Check out this big-ass German compound-noun I learnt in high school:
It means something like hot water swim bath. But that's nothing compared to this big-ass German compound noun:
Apparently it means something like, "the club for subordinate officials of the head office management of the Danube steamboat electrical services."
Not that I'm a genius in the German-language or anything - I don't accidentally write posts in German while drunk, for instance - but I reckon those Germans have got it right. It's about time English got some more compound nouns of its own ...
Glass = Drinkthing
Knife = Cutthing
Once we get the basics of compound nouns, we can start working putting concepts together:
Fork = Eatthingthatgoeswithcutthing
Spoon = Othereatthingthatgoeswithcutthing
Sound beautiful, don't they? There are no end of everyday items that these nouns can be applied to. Transport items, for instance:
Car = Itemthatgoesvroom
Road = Longflatstonyobjectthatitemthatgoesvroomgoesvroomon
Or things of nature:
Tree = Woodthingwithleafystuff
Bird = Thingthatlivesinwoodthingwithleafystuff
Hat = Roundclothingitemforupperbodypart
Market = Largeplaceforexchangingmoneywithgoodsand/orservices
And the body:
Head = Upperbodypart
Hand = Bodypartattheendofanotherbodypart
Once you get all this worked out, you can turn quite short, dull things like poems into impressively long and incomprehensible works of art. Thus:
I put my hat upon my head
And went into the Strand
And there I met another man
Whose hat was in his hand.
This becomes this:
I put my roundclothingitemforupperbodypart upon myupperbodypart
And went into the largeplaceforexchangingmoneywithgoodsand/orservices
And there I met another collectionofseveralbodyparts
Whose roundclothingitemforupperbodypart was in his bodypartattheendofanotherbodypart
Or this brief quatrain:
One day I saw a bird
Sitting in a tree
And that little tiny bird
Was looking back at me.
Becomes this epic of personal experience:
One day I saw a thingthatlivesinleafystuff
Up in a woodthingwithleafystuff
And that little tiny thingthatlivesinleafystuff
Was looking back at me.*
*(I'm still working on a compound noun for this one. It's a toughie.)
UPDATE - What's that - this post was boring? Oh, go and look up swear words in the dictionary then. Some people are never amused!
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