Sunday, April 16, 2006

Sunday Morning Pastoral Postage

The Tale of Leuqsicon and Philomela

Ah! There you are, my sweet Philomela! Thou petal, thou delicate flower of womanhood, thou paragon of all that is beauteous about thy sex! I am filled with ebullience at the very sight of you!

Eh? What's that you say?

Yes, I am elated to have found you on this gracious day! The sunbeams smile gladly down on me, Philomela; the purling rill seems to chuckle with joy: for I must admit that I can no longer quell my mounting ardour for you, Philomela: indeed, my bosom swells with the most voluptuous passion whenever a thought of you brushes my neuronal cells! Yes, Philomela, I am extravagantly and utterly enraptured by you!

Ya wanna root, then?

Alas, no, Philomela! Neither nuts nor berries nor any of the other healing fruit of the ground can heal my tortured adoration for you! For - let me confess this to you, my sweet one - I long to possess you entirely; to clasp your skin to my skin; to engage in le flagrante delicto, until, in the throes of white-hot passion, our tumescent bodies shall together attain heights of ecstasy as yet only dreamt of by our philosophers!

Ya wanna root, is that it?

O my cruel but eloquent princess, you mock me in my pain! I flinch as would a babe from the barbs of outrageous fortune! Yea, even now, my eager anticipation of the sweet hours of togetherness that we could enjoy, my Philomela, turns to horror! *Sobs* The time is fast approaching, my femme fatale, when I may be forced to end my torment, to my 'quietus make with a bare bodkin!'

*Flashes tits* Well, come on, 'ave a grope then, ya pussy!

Oh! Cruel vixen! Truly, La Belle Sans la Merci hath me in thrall!

(Exeunt Leuqsicon in tears, followed by Philomela, swearing at him)



nailpolishblues said...

I dare you to try this down your local...hell, I might borrow it.

TimT said...

Which part will you be playing - Leuqsicon or Philomela?

nailpolishblues said...

Given that these things usually end in my tears [sometimes of horror] I guess I'll be Leuqsicon. Having said that, I'm not usually quite so naive when people offer me body parts to touch.

Email: timhtrain - at -

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