It's the state election here in Victoria, and I thought I'd take this opportunity to explain some of the lesser known terms and concepts to Australian democracy.
The Election Roll is a ceremony undertaken by the winning candidate after all the votes are counted. It's an eccentric practice, bizarre, and often frankly barbaric; and therefore eminently suitable to Australian Democracy.
Alfred Deakin takes part in a roll down the hill in the early 20th century.
A Political Party will occasionally join together to try to turn a person into a politician. The process of person turning to politician is a dangerous one, and often irreversible: indeed, some politicians die that way. However, with gentle reassurance and care, they can gradually be turned back to normal people.
Many parties are in fact almost indistinguishable, including Labor, Liberal, the Democrats, the Democratic Labor Party, and the Liberal Democratic Party. As a matter of fact, about the only party with clear policies is the little known Party For The Worship of Gaknor The Magnificient, which stands on a platform of Death, Destruction, a Reign of Blood, Fire, Torment, and More Public Transport, which is why I voted for them.
Photograph from recent campaign launch by the Party For The Worship of Gaknor The Magnificient.
The Opinion Pole is a Polish person who lives in St Kilda, a suburb of Melbourne. He has no idea about Australian politics, or any other politics, for that matter, but for some reason, the newspapers keep on running columns by him. No-one knows why.
The Opinion Pole in traditional Melbourne costume.
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