kidattypewriter

Friday, January 12, 2007

Look! Up in the Sky! Is it Absurd? Is it a Pain? No! It's Superlativeman!

It seems it's All Quotes on the Western Front:

Melbourne based "performing artist", Danielle Freakley, plans to spend the next two and a half years speaking only in stolen quotes, no matter the situation.

To quote or not to quote: that is the question. On the one hand, there's a quote for everything, and everything has its quote. On the other hand, some quotes are just one quote too many.

To quote Caz:

Listening to her trying to place an order for a de-caff, low fat, soya milk, with hazelnut, might be mildly interesting - once.

Hmmm ... "If the frappe fits, I'll wear it?"

Likewise, ordering a large, super supreme, thin and crusty pizza, no capsicum, no olives, lots of anchovies, extra mushrooms and some pineapple.

"I'll have the RIP: Rest In Pizzas?" I suppose you could always say "I'll have an all beef patty, special sauce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun." But when it comes to quotes, everyone wants a piece of the pie: it's a case of glare and glare alike.

Each profession has their quote. Doctors have a cure for what ails you, poisoners have an ale for what cures you, and alcoholics have an ale for what ails you. Farmers reap what they sow; actors weep for the show; knitters both reap what they sow and sew what they reap; and long distance canoe-racers row through the deep, although hopefully they don't seep what they row.

So, taken as a whole, when I consider the positives and negatives of this quoting policy, I take a little from column A and a little from column B, and I think I may say, without fear of permanent contradiction, 'none of the above.'

Then again, Groucho Marx said:

Outside, a dog is a man's best friend. Inside a dog, it's too dark to read.

I think I'll just quote while he's ahead.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

you are wicked awesome rad. keep in touch

Anonymous said...

Sigh. "Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read." See, this is what happens when you don't watch enough TV.

Speaking of which, I'd prefer it if it was like that P.G. Wodehouse story where a shy young man is instructed by his doctor to sing instead of speak at all times, to boost his self-confidence.

hohocj!

Anonymous said...

Have you guys seen the Australian blog awards:

http://www.collectiveapathy.com/bernies_07_nominations

I reckon you'd be a shoe-in

Don Quixote said...

"Doctors have a cure for what ails you, poisoners have an ale for what cures you..."

Gold sir, absolute gold.

TimT said...

Debbie (first name Desperate), your wish is my command. Love the snoopy icon.

Ben, my favourite along those lines is a character in the Moliere play Le Bourgeouise Gentilhomme who apparently spends his entire life speaking prose, and doesn't realise it. (I haven't seen or read the play, just heard of this second-hand.)

Westius, indeed I have. Scroll down a few posts to see my nominations.

DQ - You're too kind, sir. Of course, some of this post was recycled from a comment I left on Caz's blog.

Darlene said...

Desperate Debbie, that's a name to make a bloke run. Love the snoopy.

Tim's a funny guy. He should be writing a comedy show (with some help from a certain blogger) for the Comedy Festival. It's humour for the intelligent set.

Email: timhtrain - at - yahoo.com.au

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