Rebuttal: Cosmetic surgery on one's posterior.
SAMPLE SENTENCE: "What are you in for - facial?"
"Rebuttal. I lost my left cheek when saving a baby from a crocodile farm yesterday."
Qualming Tape: Tape of music and natural sounds (alarms, lawnmowers, etc) recorded for the purposes of instilling niggling doubts and slight anxieties in the listener.
SAMPLE SENTENCE: "Is that your car alarm?"
"Oh, no. It's just my qualming tape. Is it worrying you? Good. I'll turn it up... "
Camembert Quease: Illness-inducing dairy product much loved in rural France. Nowadays it is often eaten while listening to a Qualming Tape (see above).
Relaxative Tape: Musical tape full of farting sounds to aid constipated people, often recorded by the same company who record Qualming Tapes (see above).
Superpreposterousition: A superlative preposterousition - obviously.
Corroberry: 1) Ceremony by which a white Australian pays an Aboriginal Australian twenty dollars for an item of Aboriginal art, and then hocks it off for twenty million dollars on the international art market.
2) False ceremony constructed by Aboriginal Australians for the purposes of fleecing a white Australian Arts Administration body.
SAMPLE SENTENCE: "Oh, what a wonderful expression of your beautiful native culture this Corroberry is! How big would you like the grant to be?"
SEE ALSO: Rolf Boldrewood, "Corroberry Under Arms: My Time in the Colonial Arts Administration."
Bleer: Alcohol that skips most of the stages of drunkeness - tendency to say idiotic things, queasiness, anger, bouts of sleepiness, dizziness, incontinence, morning-after nausea, loss of memory, and the throbbing and lingering headache - and instead goes straight for the devastating sense of guilt and despair you get the evening afterwards, never being quite sure why. (Recommended only for people suffering from crippling excesses of optimism.)
Smartini: Cocktail that comes in a colour to match the socks you're wearing!
K-Martini: A cheap version of the Smartini (above) that is made in China and sold in supermarkets.
Wince: Wine that tastes really fucking awful.
Tim, your links stink, you fink!
- John Bangsund's Threepenny Planet
- Broken Biro
- Poetry 24
- Superlative scribbles
- Kirstyn McD!
- Rorrim a tsomla almost a mirror
- More Sterne
- Cam the man from the Dan.
- Too hot to Raaaaaaandallllllll!
- Erin's Excellently Everlasting Effervescements!
- Slammy Infamy
- Hail Paco!
- Baron Blandwagon, purveyor of cyberbunnies, hawker of Roger Corman, and Misruler of the Multiverse
- The Bolta. Aiyeeeeee!!!!!
- Bad Apple Audrey
- The cartoon church
- Sir Martinkus
- A Zemblanian abroad and at home
- A hodge podge of hotzeplotz
- THE SLAMMA!
- Jottlesby's nottings, or should that be Nottlesby's jottings?
- The Snarking of the Hunt
- Jazzy Hands
- David of Metal City
- David the Barista
- The Blogger on the Cast Iron Balcony
- Be an Opinion Dominion Minion!
- ... and Fel
- His brilliant career - from whale sushi to crumbed prawn
- Jo Blogs
- Yet another Tim
- Was two peas, now three peas
- ... Still Life - now with extra rotating cats!
- An Amazingly Awesome Australian Ampersand!
- Blink and you'll miss 'er
- Red in the land of the tigers!
- Wire of Vibe
- Chase him, ladies, he's in the cavalry!
- The Non-palindromical Editrix in Germanium
- Old Sterne
- The briefs...
- ... and the brieflets
- The Purple Blog
- Blairville, lair of all that is wicked and perfidious
- The enticingly acronymical CSH
- EXTREEEEEEEME WYNTER!
- Mark of California
- Silent Speaking
- Lexicon the Mexican
- ► 2017 (35)
- ► 2016 (71)
- ► 2015 (106)
- ► 2014 (135)
- ► 2013 (173)
- ► 2012 (275)
- ► 2011 (261)
- ► 2010 (288)
- ► 2009 (290)
- ► 2008 (316)
- Thomson and Thompson
- The Little Book of Depression
- It's Guaranteed to Close On Page Four
- On Still Not Winning The Cholmondeley
- Class Bore
- Rhetorical Pictures
- Jerk Choices
- That's Not a Television Station, That's An Acronym...
- Five Reasons Other Than Obsession To Read S J Pere...
- Enough Grope
- More Hard Hitting Photo Journalism
- Hard Hitting Photo Journalism
- Confess! You've Been Using That Carbon-Based Energ...
- Benefacto, Benefactee, Benefactum
- Unquotes of Note
- Urinetown, the newspaper
- Reader to Writer - Untitle That Book!
- Saturday Book Review: The Narnian
- Breaking News
- To Dream The Impossible Dream
- No Money Back Guarantee
- Dilemma In Porcelain
- One person Freudian word association
- A Review of two Marx Brothers films
- Coming soon, to an ocular pleasure parlour near me...
- Office Worker Blues
- A Bracing Statement of Authorial Intent
- The Horse Is Sick
- "Testing, Testing, 1, 2, 3 ..."
- Breaking News
- Gorillas In The Must
- Budget Fails Crucial Joe Smith Test
- Raymond Chandler
- But Wait! There's Less!
- Kodak Picture Machine And Juliet - A Minimalist Mo...
- Rhymes For Poems About Anxiety
- Spenserian Spelling Of the Day
- Seen In A Bookshop
- Literate Literary Criticism
- Light Blogging
- Two Things
- Encounters With The Square Root of Two
- Good News for 86
- ▼ May (47)
- ► 2006 (373)
- ► 2005 (287)