kidattypewriter

Thursday, September 04, 2008

Stuff sold on ebay

- 1930s cocktail party.
Genuine article. Slightly worn round the edges. Fey evening gowns, original martinis, cigarettes + wealthy dowager. Much witty discussion about W C Fields. Several authentic jazz cylinders being played on permanent rotation. Party started at Gayle and Freddy's house, but just kept going and going and getting bigger and bigger so Gayle and Freddy had to shift it off to the countryside, where it's been going ever since. Original party-goers dead, but spirit of the occasion - the impressive art nouveau gloss to the whole affair - carries on regardless.

May need to have licence to own monkeys.

BIDDING STARTS AT: $500 (US).

- Spiro Agnew's soul
It does exist! And in mint condition. Verified by several eminent theologians and philosophers. But please, don't bid if you are Satan or his minions.

BIDDING STARTS AT: $500,000 (US).

- My little brotherz underwear
Quik, halp me buy thiz be4 he getz home from cricket plz!

BIDDING STARTS AT: $0.20 (AUS)

- The severed head of John Gorton
Separated at last! And perfectly preserved, thanks to the knowledge I learned during my time amongst the headhunters of the Amazon. Will also throw in Bert Newton's smile (separated from the rest of his body, obv.) for the right customer at the right price.

BIDDING STARTS AT: $1000 (AUS)

- An apostrophe.
Complete with original packaging.

BIDDING STARTS AT: £1

- The Genuine Article
This Genuine Article is the genuine Genuine Article. No article could be more genuine than this genuinely Genuine Article, especially not those frauds and shams masquerading as fake Genuine Articles or genuinely Fake Articles.

BIDDING STARTS AT: $2.30

- The thought of a hot apple pie with ice-cream

BIDDING STARTS AT: $10

- The desire for a beautiful woman

BIDDING STARTS AT: $15

- Seven vague and evanescent emotions about tulips

BIDDING STARTS AT: $0.35 (US)

- Roses without the petals

BIDDING STARTS AT: $0.01

- The nose hairs of sasquatch.
Some flakes of sasquatch snot still attached.

BIDDING STARTS AT: $50

5 comments:

nursemyra said...

I can only afford the unpetalled roses

TimT said...

What if we went halves on the severed head of John Gorton? I'd be cool if you kept it at your house. Only if you let me visit from time to time.

I visited your blog, it's fabulous! How'd you find mine? I'm curious.

nursemyra said...

I found you via Gorilla Bananas

TimT said...

If you'd said that to me five years ago, I would have thought you were mad! The blogosphere has changed lots of things...

That GB, always good value. Thanks!

Artstudio Sri Lanka said...

Either by offering shipping insurance or different methods of shipping, just like offering more ways to buy, you should never limit your sales by not offering enough shipping options. Some buyers want shipping insurance when they buy an item or they want it to get to get to them faster, so allow them the option of doing so when you list your item.List your tickets on ebay with ListEasy to save time.

Email: timhtrain - at - yahoo.com.au

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