'I thought I was just going to get some minor cosmetic surgery done on my face,' says Legoman JT, who refuses to have his full artificial identity revealed to the public. 'But how wrong I was!'
JT had originally opted for some minor plastic surgery to be done to his plastic face, hoping for a 'few small touch ups. Instead, when I saw myself after the surgery, I was horrified at the results!'
See the grotesque results for yourself (warning: graphic imagery follows)
After: JT may be still smiling on the outside, but he's not smiling on the inside anymore.
And that's not all. Many shocking cases have been discovered of cosmetic surgery on plastic people going horribly wrong, with dozens of examples of surgical neglect and carelessness being handed to the courts each month.
To any real artificial readers who may be considering artificial touch-up surgery to be done to them, this journal urges them strongly to reconsider.
'I just wish I had changed my mind!' groans JT. 'I look like exactly the same artificial person as before. I mean, couldn't they have at least tried to make me look like Arnold Schwarzenegger or something?'
Tim, your links stink, you fink!
- John Bangsund's Threepenny Planet
- Broken Biro
- Poetry 24
- Superlative scribbles
- Kirstyn McD!
- Rorrim a tsomla almost a mirror
- More Sterne
- Cam the man from the Dan.
- Too hot to Raaaaaaandallllllll!
- Erin's Excellently Everlasting Effervescements!
- Slammy Infamy
- Hail Paco!
- Baron Blandwagon, purveyor of cyberbunnies, hawker of Roger Corman, and Misruler of the Multiverse
- The Bolta. Aiyeeeeee!!!!!
- Bad Apple Audrey
- The cartoon church
- Sir Martinkus
- A Zemblanian abroad and at home
- A hodge podge of hotzeplotz
- THE SLAMMA!
- Jottlesby's nottings, or should that be Nottlesby's jottings?
- The Snarking of the Hunt
- Jazzy Hands
- David of Metal City
- David the Barista
- The Blogger on the Cast Iron Balcony
- Be an Opinion Dominion Minion!
- ... and Fel
- His brilliant career - from whale sushi to crumbed prawn
- Jo Blogs
- Yet another Tim
- Was two peas, now three peas
- ... Still Life - now with extra rotating cats!
- An Amazingly Awesome Australian Ampersand!
- Blink and you'll miss 'er
- Red in the land of the tigers!
- Wire of Vibe
- Chase him, ladies, he's in the cavalry!
- The Non-palindromical Editrix in Germanium
- Old Sterne
- The briefs...
- ... and the brieflets
- The Purple Blog
- Blairville, lair of all that is wicked and perfidious
- The enticingly acronymical CSH
- EXTREEEEEEEME WYNTER!
- Mark of California
- Silent Speaking
- Lexicon the Mexican
- ► 2017 (35)
- ► 2016 (71)
- ► 2015 (106)
- ► 2014 (135)
- ► 2013 (173)
- ► 2012 (275)
- ► 2011 (261)
- ► 2010 (288)
- From the gigantic book of generalisations for ever...
- Forgetfullness Day
- Hard to believe
- Contradictorily contradistinction
- Cultural corner
- "Perfectly hellish weather!" Ralph said.
- Tedium unmedium
- Fog you!
- Ruling from the editorial desk
- An open letter to tomorrow's me
- Like, influence
- Countdown! Z, Y, X...
- An important issue
- Three news stories at once
- Dimericks: dull, dismal, dreary, depressing, or Da...
- What a thrilling life mine must be
- Cosmetic surgery on plastic people goes wrong
- One from the archives
- Lactose intolerance
- Words that haven't quite made it into the dictiona...
- Anxiety encountered on being greeted by a person w...
- Conversational snippet
- Random wintery observation
- Random comment after reading a snippet in The Aust...
- ▼ May (24)
- ► 2008 (316)
- ► 2007 (392)
- ► 2006 (373)
- ► 2005 (287)