Computer support staff: when people in the office ask you to fix a problem that basically involves switching something on or plugging it in, tell them that the equivalator delivering negative protulance to the N2 and Z31 gates has been registering negative inflows, causing statistical imbalances in the flux capacitorial areas of the hardware leading to the software.
It's deceptive, it's untrue, it doesn't mean anything at all, but it'll make them feel so much better about forgetting to press a button. It'll also make you sound shit-hot smart.
It's the little things, folks, it's the little things.
Tim, your links stink, you fink!
- John Bangsund's Threepenny Planet
- Broken Biro
- Poetry 24
- Superlative scribbles
- Kirstyn McD!
- Rorrim a tsomla almost a mirror
- More Sterne
- Cam the man from the Dan.
- Too hot to Raaaaaaandallllllll!
- Erin's Excellently Everlasting Effervescements!
- Slammy Infamy
- Hail Paco!
- Baron Blandwagon, purveyor of cyberbunnies, hawker of Roger Corman, and Misruler of the Multiverse
- The Bolta. Aiyeeeeee!!!!!
- Bad Apple Audrey
- The cartoon church
- Sir Martinkus
- A Zemblanian abroad and at home
- A hodge podge of hotzeplotz
- THE SLAMMA!
- Jottlesby's nottings, or should that be Nottlesby's jottings?
- The Snarking of the Hunt
- Jazzy Hands
- David of Metal City
- David the Barista
- The Blogger on the Cast Iron Balcony
- Be an Opinion Dominion Minion!
- ... and Fel
- His brilliant career - from whale sushi to crumbed prawn
- Jo Blogs
- Yet another Tim
- Was two peas, now three peas
- ... Still Life - now with extra rotating cats!
- An Amazingly Awesome Australian Ampersand!
- Blink and you'll miss 'er
- Red in the land of the tigers!
- Wire of Vibe
- Chase him, ladies, he's in the cavalry!
- The Non-palindromical Editrix in Germanium
- Old Sterne
- The briefs...
- ... and the brieflets
- The Purple Blog
- Blairville, lair of all that is wicked and perfidious
- The enticingly acronymical CSH
- EXTREEEEEEEME WYNTER!
- Mark of California
- Silent Speaking
- Lexicon the Mexican
- ► 2015 (106)
- ► 2014 (135)
- ► 2013 (173)
- ► 2012 (275)
- ► 2011 (261)
- ► 2010 (288)
- Exciting start-up business!
- Several unpleasant things and a pleasant thing
- Liberals, Labor 'asked' to join the Turnbull Party...
- All-purpose Australian national anthem
- Citizen weather report
- Practical suggestions for everyday use
- Second hand diets: you have dinner, I get thinner
- A review of one in two and two in one
- Bug love
- The internet has given us the power to post lolcat...
- Singles column
- Tall and small
- On coffee
- And by the way
- What my night was like
- Short title to title a short post
- Cri de apple core
- Modern mental disorders
- Advice for computer support staff
- Mixed metaphor poem
- Does anyone say this at home?
- Me in the past, tense
- ▼ August (24)
- ► 2008 (316)
- ► 2007 (392)
- ► 2006 (373)
- ► 2005 (287)