An artistic production in the medium of reality, as performed by me, Tim Train
1. Tim puts socks, pants, shirt, jumper on, does dishes, contemplates how to get cats in and make sandwich before going to work. (Prelude)
2. Bea comes in. Tim closes door behind her and sits down on chair to tie shoes and watch door to see if other cat Harriet comes to it, which Tim will then open to let other cat Harriet in.
3. Bea sits on Tim's lap, preventing him from going to door if other cat Harriet comes to it, and, indeed, of paying much attention to door at all. Tim pats Bea. (Slow movement - 15 mins, approx).
4. Tim puts Bea on chair, pokes head out door to see if Harriet in sight. Harriet comes round corner. Tim pats her. Harriet does not come inside.
5. Tim goes to pat Bea while waiting for Harriet to come inside. Chicken comes inside instead. Tim goes to chase chicken outside. Chicken does not go outside. Bea goes outside. Both cats now outside. Chicken inside. Door open. Tim frustrated. (Crescendo)
6. Tim chases chicken outside, waves Whiskas in face of cats, shuts door behind them as they come in, smirks, gloats, chuckles to self, and marches off to work. (Coda).
Tim, your links stink, you fink!
- John Bangsund's Threepenny Planet
- Broken Biro
- Poetry 24
- Superlative scribbles
- Kirstyn McD!
- Rorrim a tsomla almost a mirror
- More Sterne
- Cam the man from the Dan.
- Too hot to Raaaaaaandallllllll!
- Erin's Excellently Everlasting Effervescements!
- Slammy Infamy
- Hail Paco!
- Baron Blandwagon, purveyor of cyberbunnies, hawker of Roger Corman, and Misruler of the Multiverse
- The Bolta. Aiyeeeeee!!!!!
- Bad Apple Audrey
- The cartoon church
- Sir Martinkus
- A Zemblanian abroad and at home
- A hodge podge of hotzeplotz
- THE SLAMMA!
- Jottlesby's nottings, or should that be Nottlesby's jottings?
- The Snarking of the Hunt
- Jazzy Hands
- David of Metal City
- David the Barista
- The Blogger on the Cast Iron Balcony
- Be an Opinion Dominion Minion!
- ... and Fel
- His brilliant career - from whale sushi to crumbed prawn
- Jo Blogs
- Yet another Tim
- Was two peas, now three peas
- ... Still Life - now with extra rotating cats!
- An Amazingly Awesome Australian Ampersand!
- Blink and you'll miss 'er
- Red in the land of the tigers!
- Wire of Vibe
- Chase him, ladies, he's in the cavalry!
- The Non-palindromical Editrix in Germanium
- Old Sterne
- The briefs...
- ... and the brieflets
- The Purple Blog
- Blairville, lair of all that is wicked and perfidious
- The enticingly acronymical CSH
- EXTREEEEEEEME WYNTER!
- Mark of California
- Silent Speaking
- Lexicon the Mexican
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- A ts about ms
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- Random meaningless outbursts by people of exceedin...
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- Morning meditation
- The Ailments of Style
- Splot of news (why do I keep typing splot?)
- Kromulent Kimball
- Whimsical topics for dinner party discussion
- Do not presume to assume
- Suggestion for the day
- Hot hoodlum date offer!
- The Lalor sonata
- The dyslexic nail polisher
- Putting the mental in sentimental
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