No, don't be alarmed everyone! Don't run away! These really are the most amazing diet tips you'll ever read! Just try the wondrouns WILLTYPEFORFOOD tips for a well-rounded diet:
WELL-ROUNDED DIET TIPS
- Hamburgers are good. Circular buns, circular burgers. This is sure to be a well-rounded food!
- Chips may not seem well-rounded. They're more, sort of, rectangular, with pointy ends. But they're made from the spherical potato! That's really well-rounded! So you'll need to eat a lot of that.
- PIZZA. Can't get much rounder than that. And pie. Why else do you think they call the mathematical constant that is the ratio of any circle's circumference to its diameter pi? (Or if you want to be picky π? Hmmm?)
- And don't forget to drink beer. But only if it's in a circular bottle or glass.
Some more incredibly important well-rounded foods that you don't want to leave out of your well-rounded diet: donuts (two circles for the price of one!), Burger Rings, Cheezels, and CHOCOLATE FRECKLES. (One big circle, lots of little spheroids on them, making for an incredibly well rounded diet.) And pavlova! Certainly pavlova!
Salads, bread, pasta, and other such foods. They are much too polygonal, and not at all likely to lead to a well-rounded diet.
If you are not sure whether the WILLTYPEFORFOOD well-rounded diet is for you, why not try eating A SQUARE MEAL EVERY DAY? Start with Tim Tams - they're pretty rectangular, which is close enough to square. Then try Cadbury chocolate blocks, some cake (but only if it's square), etc, etc, etc...
UPDATE! - Also, if you follow this well-rounded diet faithfully, you are guaranteed to have a well-rounded figure. And let's face it, that's what we all want.
Now let us pause to gaze upon the profundity in rotundity that is G K Chesterton...
Tim, your links stink, you fink!
- John Bangsund's Threepenny Planet
- Broken Biro
- Poetry 24
- Superlative scribbles
- Kirstyn McD!
- Rorrim a tsomla almost a mirror
- More Sterne
- Cam the man from the Dan.
- Too hot to Raaaaaaandallllllll!
- Erin's Excellently Everlasting Effervescements!
- Slammy Infamy
- Hail Paco!
- Baron Blandwagon, purveyor of cyberbunnies, hawker of Roger Corman, and Misruler of the Multiverse
- The Bolta. Aiyeeeeee!!!!!
- Bad Apple Audrey
- The cartoon church
- Sir Martinkus
- A Zemblanian abroad and at home
- A hodge podge of hotzeplotz
- THE SLAMMA!
- Jottlesby's nottings, or should that be Nottlesby's jottings?
- The Snarking of the Hunt
- Jazzy Hands
- David of Metal City
- David the Barista
- The Blogger on the Cast Iron Balcony
- Be an Opinion Dominion Minion!
- ... and Fel
- His brilliant career - from whale sushi to crumbed prawn
- Jo Blogs
- Yet another Tim
- Was two peas, now three peas
- ... Still Life - now with extra rotating cats!
- An Amazingly Awesome Australian Ampersand!
- Blink and you'll miss 'er
- Red in the land of the tigers!
- Wire of Vibe
- Chase him, ladies, he's in the cavalry!
- The Non-palindromical Editrix in Germanium
- Old Sterne
- The briefs...
- ... and the brieflets
- The Purple Blog
- Blairville, lair of all that is wicked and perfidious
- The enticingly acronymical CSH
- EXTREEEEEEEME WYNTER!
- Mark of California
- Silent Speaking
- Lexicon the Mexican
- ► 2014 (128)
- ► 2013 (173)
- The power of non-sequiturs compels you
- Interruptus: the Can Do Campbell Newman tongue twi...
- Amazing diet tips for a well-rounded diet!
- Illusive elusive exclusive
- Notes from a day of public transport
- Star Boor
- If the super-bombs don't get you, the cigarettes w...
- Le Hill du Box
- Ask a rhetorical question
- BREAKING NEWS: Russians launch first potato into s...
- Thoughts on rhyming verse
- Need a problem? I can help!
- Survival of the fittest, Lalor edition
- My rooster doesn't work
- I stared into the abyss and the abyss stared back ...
- The Alpenhorns of faith
- Cough cough cough cough coffee
- Imaginary friends
- The moo moo blues
- Ties and Slippers
- ▼ March (22)
- ► 2011 (261)
- ► 2010 (288)
- ► 2009 (290)
- ► 2008 (316)
- ► 2007 (392)
- ► 2006 (373)
- ► 2005 (287)